Dont speak
I noe wat ure saying
So pls stop explaining
Dont tell me coz it hurts
Dont speak
I dont need ur reasons
Dont tell me coz it hurts

Juz bought no doubt's newest album The singles 1992 - 2003. A very good album.

hush hush darling
hush hush darling
dont tell me coz it hurts....ouch..

Juz came back from Thailand. A trip i will remember for life. Fatter already from all e coke n ice cream. Its very cheap there. 17baht for a cornetto tts like 60cents. Worse is e snack shop is juz next to our bunk so convenient. Didnt add in much of our training. So it seems like a holidae but its not. =)
Brief outline:
Night b4 setting out- We sneaked out to Zouk for a mambo session. We wasted e night shaking but werent wasted. Ate prata at Simbang Bedok b4 heading back. Money minded tenants only waiting for ur n bugging us to pay for e pratas. They were slow in service n irritating. Woke up at 6 flew over.

Day 1- Woke up uncomfortable thirsty n tired. By e way we flew by military plane. Didnt write much dont really remember wat happened. Guess we settled down n waited for e next day.
" Goondos using mosquito nets". Tts wat i tot when we all we setting up e nets. Coz obvious e Thais dont use them.

Day 2- Parade- Fell asleep again. Dont noe why i always do. Visited e Thai army musuem n understand their history. VEry impressive. If ur museum is small u should see our heritage display its not even half e size.
Everyone's talking abt e canteen owner's daughter. We called her Rosemary. Didnt see anything special abt her. Think its her eyes. New discovery Clifford's mom is a thai so we got an interpretor. No one knew at least not me n my platoon.
Went to e gym at night n practised my tkd n muay thai i learnt there. Den power-run ard e track. Its scary running round e track with no lights. U cant see wats ahead.

Day 3- Was training e whole day. At night we were admiring e stars. Jiaming den showed us his Astronomy club knowledge. Didnt noe he was in e club n was e president.

Day 4- To draw e curtains is to close or open e curtains??.
Sunday. Tour to Lopburi Town.
Stopped at e aids hospice there. Its a budhist funded one. Went into e terminal stage wards where all e patients were dying soon. All skinny. Sculptures made of bone resin outside with scary images of pple suffering n crying out for help. A musuem filled with dried dead bodies all of e patients who willingly give their corpses to be used for educating e public abt e threats of aids. A sad reminder tt there is so much more to e world than my eyes can see.
Den we headed for Lopburi town. Walked aimlessly coz my grp left me. They didnt check back. Walked ard wif Kuek n Liow. Nothing much to see. Played with e modes on Kuek's camera. SOLARISE IS E BEST. E image focused is blurred at e edges so cool. Met p with another group with a lead..e Godpa. Clifford's grp. Took a cab down to Big C. Its like their Carreforre

Day 5- Jungle Survival Training.
Taught by this senior. Ate fried bugs. Leaves. Bamboo steamed rice. Fruits of a diff. kind. Found out abt diff water sources. Display of e diff snakes of thailand. Whoaz. There were e normal pest snakes. To cobras to even e king cobra. I have nv seen a cobra b4. It looks like a normal snake but once flared e shape comes out. Snakes cant see under left rght only in front of them. I used to love snakes when i was a kid. Had this book abt them tt i always flip thru again n again.
Lunch was to be cooked by us. We took e stuff but after a while e thais took over. They were very skilled in it. Lunch was delicious but juz too much had to try n finish everything.
On ourt way back passed a plantation full of blossoming sunflowers. Super beautiful. It was very near our dropzone. E riggers got sunflowers from one of e soldiers. So sweet. Anyway e tonners in thailand rule e road. Juz horn n e slower vehicle will get out of e way n they travel at super fast speeds. not like singapore only 50km/h. Slow.
" Love me Love me
Say that u love me
Fool me Fool me
Go on n fool me. "
Seldom hear anything english.

Imm Leow- full already.

Day 6- Jump
Blue skies beautiful scenery but i really couldnt be bothered worried abt e landing phobia from my last jump where i injured myself. Landing very far from e pick up point.
Quite cool. N sweet, past e sunflowers again. Now i noe why Karene like sunflowers so much. E thai CO quote: Welcome to e Royal Thai Airborne Family wahzz...felt so great.

Day 7- Demo
Mad scitentist did alot of special things. U can nv ever do without any officier or in charge intervening n saying its too dangerous. There anything goes. As long as no one gets injured.

Trip to Big C: got to noe this thai soldier. Pakin who resembles e guy in e gods muz be crazy. N has a high pitch voice too. His obession with going to Big C..." Big C big C"
Tot e thai soldiers were going to bring us ard but haiz only a few. Nv really get a chance to really interact with them. Nothing much watched e band outside perform. Walked ard. Sit in Black Canyon Coffee n rot. Rot..Black Canyon's alot cheaper here.
Sianz lost my shampoo n shower foam, left it in e bathroom.

Hmmm....nv write much already coz my pen was running out of ink n its mostly training. N i was as usual sleeping during e lectures.

Col 4:6 " Let ur conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so tt u may know how to answer everyone"

Was thinking wat to join in Uni. Wat cca...

"Since u died with Christ to e basic principles of this world, why ,as though u stll belong to to it, do u submit ti its rules? Do not handle, do not taste! Do not touch!"
Col 2:20-21

Went down to e flea market.:
So big n interesting. Food, shirts, clothing, hardware tools, bike spare parts, weaponry, puppies even. They even were selling a cross bow n even scopes for sniper rifles. Bought a t-shirt too small. N a checked one which i like alot. Wanted to buy Karene a red cross t-shirt. Writes a universal sign n a print red cross in e middle. Too bad only got male size. Dont tink she can fit. Hmm...Dont buy medium there. Its too small. Seriously. too too small. Waste money.

Free day spent planning for e outfield. Commander level none of my business.

Paul's longing, to see e Thessalonians:
" For what is our hope, our joy, or e crown in which we weill glory in e presence of our Lord Jesus when he comes? Is it not u? Indeed u are our glory n joy."
1 Thess 2:18-20

1 Thess 4:3-8
" It is God's will tt u should be sanctified: tt u should avoid sexual immorality; tt each of u should learn to control his own body in a way tt is holy n honourable, not in passionate lust like e heathen, who do not know God; n tt is this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told u n warned u. For God did not call us to be impure but to live a holy life. Therefore, he who rejects this instruction dos not reject man but God, who gives u his Holy Spirit. "

1 Thess 5:16
" Be joyful; pray continually; give thanks inm all circumstances, for this is God's will for u in Christ Jesus. Do not put out e Spirit's fire; do not treat prophecies with contempt. Test everything. Hold on to e good. Avoid every kind of evil."

=) to be continued...quite tired...

Session 2
Nv write much, writing from memory. N also missed out on adding e training coz its not right to disclose...
I will go down with this ship
I wont put my hand up n surrender
There will be no white flag upon my door
Im in love
Always will be

Sunflower Cairnval-
Went to visit e carnival on e its last dae. Quite interesting like a pasar malaam. But nothing much all selling e same thing. Got very little things of sunflower. Mostly food n clothes, I walked abt e carnival 3 times coz i didnt wanna go for a massage n e bus will only come at 2300 wich was like 5 hours of walking.

Closing Ceremony: Parade.
Den played soccer, i went to do stores coz i dont like playing soccer. E stakes were beer. By e time i went there. Many of them had drank alot already. Had to finish up some of e bottles to save e others. Den we changed headed to e cookhouse for farewell party. It was really a party. With a live band. The thais were drinking alot n inviting us to join them. Good drinkers they all. I accepted some but left for e dance floor to escape e drinking. Danced alot n ate alot to try to keep sane. At e dancefloor one of e older soldiers was asking us to finish up bourbon coke. Drank n played our hearts out. Many things happened tt nite. E casuality rate increased from 0 to 3...haha..

Next day tour ard Lopburi town
Spent e whole afternoon exploring e town. Found many back allies with flea markets n a hidden market selling all sorts of stuff plus a big bike shop there..They were selling a singapore jersey very nice but i didnt buy no point. Walked ard. Went into May n Mild a coffee house. Chatted with e owner. A pretty ger in her early 20s. May was her name we all assumed. Of course Ivan was head over heels over her.
Dinner at a restaurant OC's treat.
Got live band. Pestered them to play hotel california n winds of change. They only played hotel california. E guitarist really impressive us with his guitar licks n solos. He even was soloing n tapping n talking to e waitress at e same time soo cool..Anyway e dinner was ok lahzz.. E place was exotic but full of mosquitoes. N outside was a murky pool we all tot was empty juz a decor but we were wrong There were fish in there. Very big onez..they resembled seacows but had flat faces n stripes on the back near their tails. Dont noe wat they were but they were creepy nv wanna be in e same waters as them wateva they are.
After e dinner we headed to The Bank e nightclub there. A live band again but this time we were bored. E performers were quite irritating.
Next day Bangkok!.
Went shpping at MBK our first stop we spent alot of time there. Vewry very big. Then Siam Discovery Centre n Siam Center. Wat can i say. Shop lorzz...nothing much.

Haizz...now i m back at home. I miss e times there. Life is so carefree there. People so real, true. N e gers quite pretty. Hehe~
I hope i will nv forget these daes. Wonder wat to send over for xmas we should
after all they were great hosts...

There are no shortcuts. Pure pain n hardwork. Scars act as reminder to wear protective gear.
Something i tot of when i was riding juz now...

Suddenly interested in bmx riding. Tink i giving up hope on doing street on a mountain bike. Feel its so bulky like my body frame so big n hard to whip ard. Haven achieved much besides pogo n a little tackstands. E bmx having a small frame size ncompared to my body size. Its alot easier to flick n to jump ard. My interest for cycling doesnt come from tour de france or e tiring circuit training up n down bt hill thought they are all very inspiring to me. It was X-games tt got me interested in cycling. With its flatland bmx n street bmx competitions. E big air..e cool grinds n stalls n tricks. E flatland tricks tt really amazed me. Tts also why i like inline skating coz of aggressive inline..also showed in e x-games. N who can ever forget skateboarding. Tony Hawks was at his prime at tt time. Remember he did a 960degree tailgrab to beat e record if i am not wrong. Haha..excuses excuses. Nothing comes without practice. They can do it with their bmx i can attempt to on my bicycle. Well, maybe after a few years..advised my cycling karkey not to get another bicycle. Not worth it. One is enough. No one is usually satified with wat they have. =)
My next investment a pair of gloves..haha..n better brakes.

juvenile adjective
FORMAL OR LEGAL relating to a young person who is not yet old enough to be considered an adult:

adolescent
noun [C]
a young person who is developing into an adult

2 groups all wrong abt adolescent..haha...so wat's adolescent's age range??..Im an adolescent??. Hmm...difficult qns to ans..hmmm...i wan e answers when i come back in 2 weeks.
haha..

2 parties.
2 different School of thoughts

1. Juvenile- anyone under 18 Adolescent- almost e age of puberty
2 Juvenile- young punk who cant make his own decisions Adolescent- very young kid
ideas any1??.. Cant imagine 20 year olds debating abt this..haha..

Last night my fren asked me a very question which puzzled me n also upset me. He asked me why in e Bible e pple then werent allowed to animals with split hoofs n some other stuff but now there seems to be no such restrictions n y e Sabbath dae is on a sundae when it should be on a Saturday coz then Sundae is e start of a new week??. His question was tt Christians nowadays are not living accord to e Word..or wat it seems. It wasnt said so politely. Anyway i was shocked coz he's a Christian juz tt he dont go to church frequently. I could only quote him from Acts God told Peter's vision of God instructing him to kill n eat chapter 10 but tt was to show tt e Gentiles were unclean n tt he should spread e gospel to them. I smsed Yahui n she gave me a possible reason was tt being Gentiles we arent bounded by e Law. like e guys dont have to be circumised. Coz whether Gentile or Jew e most important is not e laws but lving e Lord. I paraphrase again..i explained tt on our calendar Sunday's e 7th dae so its e Sabbath dae. But Sundae's e first dae in e Jewish calendar. He asked then are we comromising to e way of e world. (paraphrased). In my 20 years of existence, except in my adolescent years, i have always had issues with e Bible especially e old testament but i didnt really ask pple coz i usually cant form up wat i really wanna ask. Answers were slowly revealed after sticking to church all these years. But they haven been fully answered. I dont remember e questions. But like wat Pastor Loon says u believe in a pack of lies??. Some of these issues are packs of lies. We juz cant see it, i see why pple pray for discernment. I thank God for good frens like Vincent n Pee tt really kept me in church when i really felt like leaving. I always ask myslef if i m giving up on our friendship? Tt year i didnt leave..
Well as we were watching tv e pple ard den started asking similar questions, but it werent as serious as this. Vivan Hsu den appearred on Tv si zi loo koh..e discussion changed to love n gfs. Wat would do if ur gf was a pornstar..aa promicious when younger..all tt..its a ego thing, tts wat i felt. Love is not self-seeking..well, as long as she changes..=)
Haunted by my fren's question i tossed in bed trying to recall wat i have learnt all these years. I couldnt remember much.
Joshua 1:8 Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. 9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go."

Lessons in french:
Bojour- Good morning or Good day
Monsieur-Mr
Madamesoille(cant remember how to spell)- Miss
Madame-Mrs
Au Revoir- Good Bye
Comment Allez-Vous-How was ur dae?
Et Vous- n u??
tres bien, merci (very well. thank u)
Donnez- give
moi- me
parlez lentement- speak slowly
huit- eight
bonne nuit- good night
bonsoir- good evening
joli-pretty
papier-paper
homme- man
hmm..cant remember e book's back in camp..haha..free french lessons found in in e ps bunk n noone wanted it. Quite interesting but very hard to learn especially since its so similar to english but pronounced differently. E pronouniations are many exceptions..cheem..
Got an off dae tomolo. Dont noe wat to do. Got nothing to do todae. Juz lazing ard..Writing my blog..filling up some quiz or questionaires on friendster. Wat to do?? Where to go??.. I dont noe...E roads are wet, dont feel like cycling. REad...hmmm...i got some books to read...

Feel we are drifting apart
And there's nothing I can do
But stretch out my hand
U looked e other way

Went out wif my brother!!!
I went out with my bro!! E first time in years!! This afternoon after reaching home, he told me he wanted cut his hair. I went to e salon with him as I need to cut my hair too coz of the thailand trip dont wanna trap too much heat but mostly coz RSM has been pressing us to. Anyway we hopped into his car waited outside e salon for half an hour, b4 e hairdresser came to serve us. We chatted a little, i brought home e tot Uni life is fun why waste my last years of study becoz of money n reject hostel life??
I wanted to cut spiked hair style. Watching my hair fall n get shorter n shorter isnt too fun. Well for ur info, its my first time going to a barber besides e one in my camp. U ask her cut wat style she wont understand seems e same to her hehe~. Anyway ya my mum usually cuts my hair. E hairdresser did a good job but it was hard figuring out wat he was trying to do until he finishes. Some wat like a piece of art.
After tt we headed e Far East as my bro wanted to get a crumpler bag. Seedy 3 e model..so cool black in colour. He used my Get a Life card added 8 bucks to my credit. Need 3 more dollars n i will draw even with e cost of e card. Anyone need to get anything from 77 street??.
Shopped ard n changed money for my thailand trip.
After tt we headed to Clementi to buy game n he bought a neverwinter nights expansion set. after tt we went home to pick up our parents for dinner at Soup Restaurant. My mum's birthdae dinner. Soup Restaurant's food is terrific. Like wat my bro says common but delicious. It is very very hao ci.
My mum wanted to get a shaver for stitch so went to e pet shop. We took some time looking at e doggies they had there. They had boston terrier, border collie, corgi, papillion chihuahua, silky terrier, lazy jack russell, cocker spaniel n a super fluffy pomerian. Left empty handed as there werent enough choices. Tt sums up my day todae. Didnt go for cell or rockclimbing coz i didnt wanna feel anymore cramped up e way i felt tis week when everything juz suddenly comes flying our way. =)

Nowadaes camp life seems so fun. Maybe its becoz i began to open up n let pple understand me more. Tink i become more chatty. Feel more n more bonded with e pple ard me. I believe they will catch me if i fall. =)

Riding back on a taxi with Joseph n ziJun n Ronson. I suddenly remembered how my guitar "Jasmine" came in my life. One fateful Chinese New Year, my brother after doing lotsa research decided to buy a Takamine Jasmine from Davis guitar i tink. After collecting e guitar, he went down to my cousin's house for family reunion. Left e guitar with me as he hurried to join my elder cousins. He told me to leave it somewhere. I left it leaning against e wall n went off doing my stuff. It dropped on e floor n e neck was broken into two i wasnt aware. Until after e whole thing, my bro realised it was broken when he took it out. He was heartbroken n very angry at me but he didnt scold me. I could see e fury in his eyes. My uncle conpensated him but giving him money to buy a new one. He bought exactly e same one. Bro was okno major money losses. After playing for a few years he gave up playing guitar n now puts alot of energy on soccer. E guitar is now in my room. Rusting n rotting. Hehe~ Lotsa scratches on e pick area coz of kor kor. Alot of others becoz of me, I usually put it on a stand beside my bed n in e morning i accidentally kick it or knock it off while sleeping. But I like this guitar. So nice polished black, with jasmine on its machine head n clear crisp sounds from its sound hole. It beats any Yamaha hands down. N wats best it looks like e guitar Bon Jovi brings for his concerts. Its juz a different model same brand. =)

Juz took my basic theory again...yesterdae. Got 4 mistakes already tink I m gonna fail again. I hope not, but i feel alot more confident of passing then e previous. My frens gave me lotsa advice. Each gave alot of advice n tips while i was studying in bunk. My mind was divided learning french from a coursebook i found in e office with cd n basic theory. Wahzz...french very hard to learn...really very difficult.

Leaving on e 13th for Thailand. Feel like so much I haven done yet. But den again I am going going for 2 weeks. Juz hope our very extra OC wont make us do double jobs like he always does. E best thing is i can skip ippt for 2 weeks more. Dont have e drive to train or e determination to cross e finishline faster den anyone. Feel I have proven myself dont have to try so hard. But if I dont i have to run a zillion times until i can. I can i used to. I used to love running now i hate it to e core. Pple change.
Some things never change, Some things do. -Matrix

Haven riden my bike for weeks now. Its rusting. My chain keeps getting sucked. Help!!! Hmmm. Yesterdae went to Seng Chu Heng. Guess who i saw. Yan!! Yan used to e mechanic from dirtwerks. I used to patron tt shop alot. Den he went to help out at e bike shop outside church. Remember e bike i rode n posted its pics on my blog tts his. Chatted for a while, poor thing from holland have to travel to tampines. Tink he's a aprentice coz they made him paint e backgate.

Haizz...Asked mum whether i could learn bike license for e umpteen time. She said no again. I had nothing to say against her. She asked me if I wanted to torture her by making her worry abt me. The way my brother made her when he got his bike. Haizzz..Dont wanna make her worry abt me. But using a bike is very practical at our age. N also i been wanting to ride a scrambler for ages. =(
Basic theory on fridae. Been reading it thru alot of times. But still not too confident abt passing. Hope i do. Really.

Not in e mood to do anything.
Juz now was trying to practise my trials riding gave up within 20 mins. Was trying to jump from one end of e court to e other. Still not jump far n dont have e stamina to jump repeatly. Wat's worse is e bike is now very heavy coz i changed to a heavier handlebars n tires. More control but less snappy. Haizz.. How to jump up stair when i cant even get e basics ritez? Tot i was going somewhere, feel like i starting from square 1 again. Dont have e heart to practise, need inspiration.

I have a jump on mondae.
Combat jump. Jump with my pack n sbo. Very heavy. Tts not wat i am afraid of, I am afraid of landing wrongly. The last time I jumped i landed on my butt, coz my knees gave in n i fell sideways. Tink i didnt lock my kneees tight enough. Scared of looking out of e jump door. N tinking I cant control what happens next besides looking out for each other n trying to land properly. Unlike our 1st few jumps, we were not afraid but u grow more n more afraid when u dont practise jumping for a long time n when slowly ur fren's stories of how they got injuried seep slowly into ur brain. U tink gosh! i may die there. Break a hand or leg. E perils of jump abound from twists to collisions to bad landings. Maybe I should close my eyes lock my knees tight n land. Tt way i wont reach for e ground n risk a toe injury n probably can land properly. Wish me luck!!. Can feel abit of how terminally ill pple may feel when e doc diagnosed them with e diease. I haven done many things, i am not done, not so soon...not so soon.